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The Monkey's Paw


#1

Do a wish, someone then post the consequences and do the same
Keep doing that!

Rules to not make it dumb:

  1. The consequence MUST be based on clever phrasing and/or holes from the one who is asking it. If someone wishes to be rich, don’t say “Granted. But your family dies”. It has absolutely no cohersion. Instead, write “Granted, but you can’t spend the money” or “Granted, but you are rich of proteins at your body!”.
  2. Always start your post granting the wish from the comment above you, then saying the consequences and then asking your own wish. Any post that do not follow this template shall be ignored.
  3. Do not answer your own wish.
  4. You can try to elaborate your wish as complex as you like, or just make it as vague as possible to see what people can come up with.

This is based on this SubReddit, which is based on a book that follows the principles of this game.

Starting!

I wish I didn’t need to wake up 4AM everyday.


#2

Granted, but now you want to wake up at 4AM everyday

I wish for a limitless supply of breadsticks


#3

I laughted a lot
But you forgot the wish :eyes:


#4

Granted, but they are literally limitless, come up all at once and you have no place to keep them.

I wish for a good, comfy pillow to sleep.


#5

Granted, but your bed has ceased to exist. :ghost:

I wish that I was good at FM


#6

Granted, but everyone else is better.

I wish I could play any instrument I like, audible to any person, as good as any rockstar that lived.


#7

Granted, but you now play instruments like Rockstar’s CEO.

I wish I had a nice meal


#8

Granted, but it was just one nice meal. All your future meals are gonna be trash.

I wish I had good shoes.


#9

Granted, but there is always water inside.

I wish this break wasn’t so boring


#10

Granted, but now it’s over.

I wish I was given 5 dollars whenever I went to the public transit with no negative implications


#11

Granted, but the no negative implications part is cancels and you lose 15 dollars everytime you go to the public transit.

I wish all pirates were broke.


#12

Granted, happens that you are a pirate.

I wish I could read multiple pages at once.


#13

Granted, but you can only read them in languages you don’t understand.

I wish I could get a life.


#14

Granted but it’s only on the internet and in real life you are just a shut in.

I wish I could phase through walls


#15

Granted, but you will lose all your cells after doing this.

I wish i could be transported to the medieval ages

also Geyde, that hit right in the feels


#16

granted but now you are stuck there

I wish for a working time machine that can take me to any time I want, wont break and is one I know how to operate safely


#17

also you guys suck at this. The consequences have to be a direct result of the wish. Ex:

would be “Granted but you also phase through the floor” cuz that’s what intangibility would do to you and is also a direct method of granting the wish

Otherwise I can just say “granted but you also explode” to any wish


#18

As long as it’s related it is fine


#19

well yeah but it’s unsatisfying if it doesn’t make sense


#20

see “granted but you explode”